Why no lullabies for girl children?

The wide eyes staring up at me from the crib resemble those perfectly shaped cashews floating in a bowl of pal payasam inviting you to taste them. But no, I'm not at all in a mood to enjoy and give a hi5 to my own self for this poetic comparison. 

All i need is some sleep. Atleast, a forty winks. And the elders at home suggest playing or singing a lullaby for the munchkin. Being trained at carnatic music since pre-teens I didnt find it hard to sing. But imagine doing this at 2 am!! Even an orthodox Brahmin household would not play suprabhatam at that hour.... Moreover, with half-shut eyes, dry as a bone tongue and a hazy mind, I'm not at all in a mood to sing at that time. So, the husband suggests singing during daytime and playing songs in the night at low volume. 

Ah yes, this sounds good and went on well for a few days. 

Until one fine day, when the elder champ, who loves to pamper his sister, asks me after i sing and put her to sleep: Mom, why do you sing jo jo rama/laali krishna for my 'sissy'? Are there no lullabies for girl child? 

That sets my grey cells to work and alas, no. And, I realise all these days I've been singing these songs addressing the male gods of Hindu pantheon and playing general lullabies like hush little baby or some random lullaby from old movies. 

But, aren't there any Nilambari for goddesses? Why no lullaby for the women gods who would also be tired after bestowing knowledge, wealth and valour and yearning for a tight sleep? Wont their lotus-eyes long for some rest? Wouldn't She feel tired after continuously pressing Her divine consort's feet? None of the saint-poets or dasarus has written any lullaby verse for Her? 

The feminist in me is so pissed off. The BP levels rise gradually how the sleep of a woman has been given a not-so-important tag? I remember how I revolted at my Tamizh class after the teacher read out a Bharathidasan's verse ... "pin thoongi mun ezhundhu...." eulogising women to go to sleep late and rise early in the day!! 

Seting aside all these thoughts, I answer a No to my son. Oh, he says in a pensive way and leaves the place. But comes back the next time and sings to his 'sissy': jo jo sita.... laali laali shri rakumayi (rukmani) .... and winks at me gleefully. 

Kids these days, i say ..... :-) 

Cau'war'y: The eternal water war

By now the pleading of TN to release Cauvery water, the refusal of Karnataka to do so and the intervention of apex court have all become an annual phenomenon. Politicising the issue, adding regional/linguistic colour to it affecting common people is another thing. 

Before accusing the other State or wallowing ourselves in self pity, let us get a glimpse of the water management system in Karnataka.

 

Origin of talakaveri spring

The State is dotted with numerous canals and reservoirs -- the length of which equals the length of rivers. Designing and building channels for water conveyance seems to be an ongoing task as the State has vast catchment areas and is more concerned about water preservation and efficient management of its aqua resources. They make the maximum utilisation of the Cauvery water. 

A view of Kabini dam

Take this: Cauvery's basin covers 43,586 sq km in Tamil Nadu, while it is only 34,273 sq km in its home State. But, the latter has 59 dams on the river (Karnataka has a total of 241 dams) for irrigation and water storage purposes, while TN has just five major dams on the river! I don't see any major construction activity of dams/reserviors/canals after the era of Perunthalaivar Kamarajar. 

And, we have already raped our rivers in the name of industrialisation by letting out textile/leather pollutants in to the water sources. One nice example is Bhavani river in Erode and Noyyal river in Coimbatore. Atleast, the latter has been revived thanks to a private co and some NGOs....

A polluted Bhavani river, Erode

As much as it is interested in Cauvery, the State focuses a little on the rivers in North Karnataka. Though building a canal across Tungabhadra or Krishna and channelising those waters to irrigation areas is not possible (as the riverbeds are at a higher altitude), it doesnt mean the State has neglected these rivers. Wherever possible, Karnataka has been constructing dams and reservoirs (read Alamatti dam issue on the river Krishna).

While check-dams are seen there as heroes of watershed development, the State equally focuses on farm ponds improving the agri-activity in slopes and hilly terrains. Government and NGOs have constructed ponds connected by trenches, thus arresting the racing water down the hill and making it to dwell and descend slowly down numerous vertical paths. 

Is this post eulogising Karnataka? No, certainly not... We will see the drawbacks as well: Karnataka's gluttony for water comes with its own drawbacks. In its overdrive to preserve all the Cauvery water and irrigate its lands, the KA government seems to have failed to take into consideration its marine resources. It is a rule of thumb that a particular percentage of river water has to be channelised to rivermouths that are home to unique plant and animal communities. River mouths are places of busy activity: it is a place where much of the gravel, sand, silt, and alluvium (clay) carried by a river is deposited forming a triangle-shaped land called delta (Cauvery delta in Tamil Nadu). The rivermouths are often a good place for fishing and are home to dynamic ports and harbours (like the world's busiest Rotterdam port) which lets the maritime activities of a State thrive. But, it seems that Karnataka may soon lose its aqua resources. 

Coming back to the point, if Tamil Nadu expects Karnataka to release the Cauvery water after meeting its own needs, TN is not even going to get a drop of water from its neighbour. 

Mettur dam (old pic)

Instead of always being at the mercy of neighbouring States for water sharing, it should start practising water conservation measures such as building check dams, dredging the reserviors, etc. 

Also, the riparian States (areas that are irrigated by Cauvery, to be specific) can shift from water-intensive crops and take up lesser water-consuming crops such as coarse cereals. 

Instead of waiting for the water with a parched throat like the mythical bird Chakravaha, it is high time TN learnt its lesson and prepared to take on the mighty GhandaBerunda bird.

---

Brexit: What does it mean for farm exporters, commodity exchanges?

 

The whole world is waiting with a bated breath for June 23 as to whether it is going to be a Brexit or Bremain. But for India and its trade arena, what sense does it make? Come, we will help you join the dots... 

On June 23, British citizens will vote: should the United Kingdom remain in the European Union, or leave? If its a Bremain, global markets will heave a sigh of relief and it will be business as usual. But if its a Brexit, it will trigger a dominos effect which may result in the realignment of Europe’s financial sector, property market, immigration, Free Trade Agreements, imports and exports.

Now, the background

The EU is a group of 28 countries that have agreed to abide by certain rules that supercede each nation's own rules and laws. This is mainly to facilitate trade and commerce in ways that make each signatory country better off. In principle, the EU supports four freedoms: the free flow of goods, services, workers and capital among all 28 countries. Mind you, the EU is different from the Euro Zone (a group of 18 countries that have adopted the euro as their currency). And here, the UK does not use the Euro, nor do other EU countries such as Sweden, Poland or Hungary. 

What will happen if its a Brexit?

As we said earlier, if its a Bremain, its business as usual for many secotrs and the stock markets could possibly see a rally. In case, it is a Brexit, what happens? Well, while an actual departure would take atleast 2 years with procedural hassles being worked out, the implications might well be immediate. The dollar would probably strengthen as many investors bought US securities as a hedge against this European parlour game. 

The UK, once it divorces itself from EU, would no longer benefit from the free-trade pacts among EU countries or with other nations governed by the EU deals. The UK could either negotiate trade deals with its European peers or do away with those deals. Being a global hub for finance and commodity exchanges (remember the bullion benchmarking taking place in London and the London Metals Exchange trading), there would be pressure on big banks or investors to move their operations and other activities out of the UK. and so, other trading hubs, especially New York stands to gain.

How does it affect India?

Brexit will increase global volatility thereby impacting capital flows and currency exchange. Indian businesses have substantial presence in both the UK & Europe. The Guardian says there are more than 800 Indian-owned businesses in the UK, with more than 110,000 employees. 

For long time, India has seen and used Britain as a trade gateway to the EU. So if Brexit happens, it may alter our trade equations with the entire EU. In case of a Brexit, we will have to re-negotiate our trade pacts which were being regulated by the EU. Indian investments made in the UK will be at a disadvantage because of correction in property prices (again, London property market is seen as a benchmark) and the probable changes in import tariffs.

The churn would add up to Indian exporters' compliance costs as we will have to adhere to two different standards. For instance, EU is the thrid largest importer of India's seafood. So, if Brexit happens marine exporters will suffer adhereing to separate sets of safety norms, quarantine measures and all. Also, the UK imports a major chunk from the Indian spices basket, while there are a separate set of EU regulations governing import of chilli and its products and nutmeg from India. 

Added to this is the possible depreciation of the euro/pound sterling which may hit these exporters. A sluggishness in exports mean there will be an oversupply of that particular produce in the domestic market. Falling exports is not a good indicator on a country's economic report card.

No game this... Brazil may go bankrupt

As much as I love watching the Olympics (the grand opening ceremonies, marathons, discussing the day's sports with the closer ones, savouring the host country's scenic beauty that the TV cameras show), the cost factor has always been there in the back of my mind. I've always wondered how much it would take for the host country to spend and bost infrastructure as soon as they become the chosen one to host the games? But a news report that I read today just made me cringe at the risky financial details involved.

With Rio declaring a 'public calamity' over a major budget crisis ahead of the Olympics, it seems more turmoil is in store for Brazil, the South American country we all remember for its colour, splendor and carnivals.
Rio state authorities have declared a 'state of public calamity' to release emergency funds to finance the Olympic Games that are to begin in August.
The August Olympics and September Paralympics in Rio de Janeiro will be the first to be held in South America.
But hosting the game has always proved to be a risky financial proposition. Traditionally, when a country successfully bids for the Olympics, it is expected to make huge investments in improving infrastructure such as building massive hotels, expand its road/rail/air connectivity, build arenas/stadia to host the games. All these might put a burden on the country's Budgetary reserves.
But on the positive side, hosting the game may boost tourism boom by showcasing the country to the entire world. Will Brazil pull this off without going bankrupt in the process?
Back in 2010, when Rio succesfully bid for the Olympics, everything about Brazil was sparkling: it had a stable economy and political condition, a stable currency, peaceful democratic goivernment, vast oil was discovered off Rio's coasts... So much positives were there. But in the recent years, Brazil's economy is in doldrums - the country is mired in a recession that is worst in 2 decades (25 years to be precise), its GDP has been shrinking every year and it has just an "above junk" rating, fall in global oil prices, delayed paychecks for government servants, population taking to streets to impeach the Prez, corruption in real estate, a rising unemployment rate.. And, what not?
Amnesty International has expressed concern at the cuts to social services, which could affect the training of security agents to work in crime-ridden slums. The decision to cut services and security ahead of the Olympic Games may lead to a collapse in public safety, health and environmental standards.

Rio’s state budget shows a $5.6 billion shortfall for 2016. Royalties from oil, the main revenue-earner, are projected to collapse from $3.5 billion in 2014 to $1 billion this year.
After much pleading, Rio received nearly $300 million from the federal coffers to extend its metro network. That  the federal budget itself is in no better shape is another matter of concern. Brazil's fiscal deficit is pegged at around $47 billion. And yes, they have double- digit inflation and a record 11% unemployment.

Being a believer, i can only hope Christ the Redeemer will save the nation from breaking the bank.....

Where are the teachers?

Why is teaching not revered any more?


It’s that time of the year when students pass out with flying colours and all the toppers parrot the same ambition — to become a doctor or engineer and serve the public. But what about teaching? Why don’t we hear of young people wanting to become teachers? Has the profession lost the respect it once enjoyed?

The answer, unfortunately, is yes. This is because teachers are still not paid well. Their remuneration is not at all commensurate with the hikes in student fees. Also, they have several ‘targets’ to achieve: complete this much of the syllabus in one trimester; conduct a prescribed amount of practicals/projects; make proper assessments to judge a student’s learning curve, analyse the data — and all these sans any professional development!

Today, multi-tasking is everything. In days past, teachers could teach basic grammar and arithmetic besides moral values. But today’s environment demands that a teacher play more roles — he or she has to be a role model, a counsellor, a parent figure, a judge, and all of these in a friendly way. Who would want to do all this for a minimal pay?

Worldwide, there is a shortage of well-trained teachers. According to the UNESCO Institute for Statistics (UIS), to achieve universal primary education by 2030, the demand for teachers is expected to rise to 25.8 million; India alone needs 3 million. In a rush to fill this gap, many developing countries, including ours, are lowering standards, often leaving new teachers with little or no training. As such, the talent pool in this noble profession seems to be of low quality.

Have you seen any coaching institutes for B.Ed or D.Ed aspirants? Most of those who take up teaching do so only because they haven’t been able to land other suitable, high-paying jobs. So, mediocrity seems to be ok, and this is all too evident if you were to visit a rural school.
 Though policy guidelines such as the National Curriculum Framework 2005, NCF for Teacher Education 2009, Right to Education Act 2009, and the HR Ministry's revised Centrally-Sponsored Scheme for Teacher Education (launched in 2012 with an outlay of Rs 63 billion) paint a commendable vision of transforming the elementary education system, no system can rise above the quality of its teachers.

While considerable energy has been channelled into bringing about some of these changes through the Sarva Shiksha Abhiyan, mission-mode efforts alone are not enough. Major structural changes must be brought about in the teacher education system. The alarming state of teacher training in the country is reflected in the fact that the majority of graduates who appear for the Central Teacher Eligibility Test fail to demonstrate even the most basic knowledge expected from a teacher.


Notwithstanding these, there is poor parental support. Instead of being a tad strict with their children, parents often blame teachers. Raise your voice and get yourself stabbed or shot dead by the student as it happened a while back in one of the Chennai schools.


So many governments have come and gone, yet precious little has been done for education reform. Serious steps should be taken to make teaching a sought-after profession, and to improve the hiring process. There should be an eligibility test for teachers and a continuous evaluation system besides performance-based incentives and hikes. Only if these are implemented properly, with the right rigour, can we usher in achche din among the younger minds.

Jackfruit jamboree

Jackfruit jamboree .... Love for the gigantic, tropical fruit

While mango undoubtedly is everyone's favourite during summer, the arrival of wondrous jackfruit too is equally awaited in our household.

"Here, Eat as many lobes as you want..." that is how my paternal aunt used to tell and me and my cousin would pounce on the plate like greedy, hungry cheetahs. 

Though our neighbouring State of Kerala makes the ubiquitous chips and ada, Karnataka cuisine too is peppered with a plethora of jackfruit-based dishes such as the South Canarese Chakko ghassi (jackfruit gravy with a dash of kokum), khotte kadubu (idlis steamed in jackfruit leaves that lends them a distinct aroma and flavour). 

While the rest of the family prefers the ubiquitious 'phodi' or chips like savoury to go with their coffee/tea, me being the sweet-toothed giant prefer Panas poli (flatbread made of jackfruit pulp) - the preparation of which is a daunting task for mom and aunt but they do it to satisfy the 'jihva' bhootham in my tongue. And being the frugal lady she is when it comes to kichen affairs, my maternal grandmother would not waste the jackfruit seeds and add them in kootu after sundrying them and peeling the delicate outer cover. After all, it is she who guards those hanging wonders carefully by wrapping them with a plastic sheet. 

And, I'm sure there are memories associated with summer and fruits for everyone. The way ajja (grandpa) used to feed me half-ripe jackfruit slices dipped in honey/palm sugar.... Mannah from the Heaven, it is! The love for jackfruit continued even to the music classes and no words to describe my ecstasy when I got a palamarathu veenai (veenai made of jackfruit wood).

Back here at my own home post-marriage, the love and legacy continues... The better half was so amazed to know my love for the fruit that the first ever gift I got was a grocery item - Halsinakayi Happala (jackfruit papad) which he hunted from the Ambika appalam stores in Mylapore!! Needless to say, he started loving it too after a lot of apprehension. And the annual L'Áffaire has only grown strong over the years (Halsina huchchu or jackfruit mad, as my mom puts it)  as I drool for the thorny yellow wonder when I see them in Mylapore Vidya Mandir where I leave my son for his karate classes. Carefully wrapped around in transparent plastic sheets, they invite me near but I can just heave a sigh and pester the better half to get me the fruit lobes from the nearby market.

And in my recent conversation with her, vayini (sis-in-law) tells me of the zillion dishes we prepare out of this fruit, she takes the pulp, grinds it along with jaggery, rava and coconut milk and bakes them and relishes!!!

So, how do you relish your jackfruit - as a fruit or as a vegetable or as an everything in between? ;-) 

Weather, Currency & Make in India

The headline may suggest nothing at all for a beginner. But for an expert or someone who watches the atmosphere keenly it all makes sense... Ok we'll join the dots as we read this piece.
After making people keeping their fingers crossed, 'it' has finally arrived. It, El Nino, The Child's arrival is for sure. So how is a common man going to get affected by this change in weather pattern other than remembering to take my umbrella, you ask? Wait pal, there is more to this child.
Weather forecasting agencies across the globe have predicted an imminent El Nino. The India Met Dept has said that there are 33% chances that rainfall will be deficient this monsoon, i.e. below 90%. It also forecast a 70% probability of El Nino this year. The Australian Bureau of Meteorology has declared that we are heading into a major El Nino event. 

Since Indian agriculture is largely dependent on monsoon for its water requirements, higher probability of El Nino spells a sparse/deficient rainfall.
El Nino occurs when the surface waters warm up. It takes place in the entire equatorial zone of the central and eastern Pacific Ocean. It affects wind pattern and triggers droughts and floods which typically lasts for about a year.

But why India should be worried and what will be this El Nino's impacts on markets and all that?
Ours is basically a farm economy that contributes almost 18% to the country's GDP. And we are already battered by unseasonal showers resulting in crop damage and lower output. El Nino lowers the production of crops such as rice, sugarcane, palm oil, corn, cotton and oilseeds. With El Nino coming, which usually results in drought and parched climatic conditions, inflation cannot be ruled out and we should brace ourselves to shell out more for food. And if food inflation surges, the central bank may pitch in to hike rates, manufacturing sector will suffer, and companies will be nimble-footed in making investments slamming the brakes on growth rate and the blue-eyed Make in India project.

So, is El Nino all about a bad omen?
No, not exactly. Only the Pacific Rim economies such as India, Japan, Australia, S-E Asian nations suffer while the Western Hemisphere enjoys a bountiful harvest and conducive agri-economy climate. El Nino may trigger social unrest in commodity-dependent countries that rely on imported food. 
El Nino results in both winners and losers. Countries in the western hemisphere such as the US, Canada, LatAm nations and the UK will stand to benefit as they wil receive a wet weather. This is a good news to the parched California. Also, the positive US data leads to a spillover effect on China. IMF says that China is less susceptible than other Oriental nations, policymakers might consider that any rise in the yuan due to increased trade with the US during the period might help suppress imported inflation.  Stronger yuan might have some attractions in an El Nino environment for China but for many economies, El Nino surely spells trouble.

Around the world
For Australia and New Zealand, El Nino brings hot, dry summers and accompanying drought. This leads to razed down wheat production and exports and dry dairies. In Indonesia, which, of late, is emerging as the cocoa basket, crops such as coffee, oil palm and cocoa will suffer and earlier time when El Nino struck the country in 1997-98, it not only triggered poor harvests and crop cycles but also economic unrest and financial crisis.

El Nino and Currency market
Ok, agreed it affects investments, India inc all that. But then how can a weather condition value/devalue a nation's currency unit? 
Yes, it can. In fact, to a larger extent than most of us think. If El Nino's effects can push dollar-denominated food and energy import prices, Asian economies such as India might prefer to have a stronger rupee to counter the threat of imported inflation. Also, China too may prefer to have a stronger yuan for its trade ties with the US - a nation that will surely be benefited by this climatic condition.
In short, agri-commodity exporting nations may benefit from higher prices but lose out from lower crop and industrial output. 

Teaching: is it not reverred job anymore??

It’s that time of the year when students pass out with flying colours and all the toppers parrot the same ambition — to become a doctor or engineer and serve the public. But, what about the teachers? Why do we not see people wanting to be teachers? Has teaching lost its reverence? The answer, unfortunately, is yes. Reasons: It’s a mediocre-paying profession. Their remuneration does not often commensurate with the rising fees. Also, they too have ‘targets’ to achieve: completing so much of syllabus in one trimester; conducting a prescribed amount of practicals/projects; making proper assessments to judge kids’ learning curve, analysing the data — all these sans any professional development! All the more important is his/her multi-tasking ability. In days of yore, teachers could teach basic grammar and arithmetic besides moral values. But today’s demanding education environment wants a teacher to play more roles other than just being a teacher — he/she has to be a role model, a counselor, a parent figure, a judge, etc… all that in a friendly way. So, who would want to do all these with a minimal payscale? A recent paper, jointly released by the UNESCO Institute for Statistics (UIS) and the Education for All Global Monitoring Report, shows that more than 27 million teachers will be needed to achieve universal primary education by 2030 and India alone needs 3 million teachers by 2030. In a rush to fill this gap, many countries, including ours, are lowering standards, often leaving new teachers with little or no training. As such, the talent pool entering this noble profession seems to be of low quality. Have you seen any coaching institutes mushrooming up for B.Ed or D.Ed aspirants? Most of them who take up teaching do so only out of their inability to land other high-demanding/ suitable jobs. So, mediocrity seems to be OK, which will be evident if you move to rural schools. Notwithstanding these, there is poor parental support. Instead of being a tad strict with their children, parents often blame teachers. Raise your voice and get yourself stabbed or shot dead by the student as it happened a while back in one of the Chennai schools. So many governments have come and gone yet there is little done to education reform. Serious steps should be taken to make teaching a sought-after profession, and to improve the hiring process of teachers. Let there be an eligibility test for teachers (irrespective of their degree) and a continual evaluation system besides a performance-based incentive/hike. Only if these are implemented properly with right vigour can we usher in achche din among the younger minds.

Farm genocide

What title do I give? Is it farmers'suicide? Or is it a genocide going by the alarming rise in the numbers?

Early last month, it was eight potato farmers in Bengal committing suicide. And now, it’s a Rajasthan farmer hanging himself from a tree at a political rally. Minutes after this, another grower from the same State ended his life by jumping before a speeding train.

While the media is at a frenzy reporting these showing close-up images of deceased farmers, politicians are busy in the usual mudslinging. And soon the nation will want to know everything about farmers, reasons for their suicides and all that thus bringing their pitiable family on screen.

While the Delhi government/AAP is being criticised for not acting quick enough to stop the death, AAP suspects BJP’s conspiracy to sabotage its rally! And the fresh-from-sabbatical Rahul Gandhi says it all happened because of the ordinance that has been brought by BJP. And we have an union minister giving his pearl of wisdom to farmers about gods and governments!

And noone sees the farmers’ pov. Behind these suicides lies an explosive cocktail of natural and manmade factors – crop loss caused by erratic weather, deficient monsoon, depleting watertable, procurement woes, inefficient policies with respect to taxes, loans and the deadly tentacles of private moneylenders.

The mindset of most of the educated, urban population is even more appalling: so what, they get free electricity, water supply, waiver of loans and all that!! Yes, but are these packages doing enough to address the plight of farmers? And how many farmers have access to these ‘free’ power/water? Do these limited sops do anything for crop yield, farm inputs/loans, assured irrigation, developing cold storage, marketing/pricing facilities? Or how many of the farmers are aware of crop insurance??

It is high time the government tweaked its agri-trade policies and the farmers, instead of being provided with meaningless incentives or false assurances, were educated on alternative source of income such as dairy farming, poultry, fisheries, etc. 

As I key in this, my son is reading a couplet from the Tamil work Thirukkural which runs thus: 

Palakudai nizhalum thamkudaikeezh kaanbar alagudai nizhalavar. (The reign of many kingdoms comes under the reign of those with abundant grain).

I can only think of the 2010 movie Peepli Live and nod my head with a wry smile!

MRS

A pencil sketch attempt of BL's News Editor Mr M R Subramani :)

Iron Lady dies

Pill effect

Supreme court slamming Novartis regarding the patent of cancer drug Glivec... a caricature by me after a really lonnnnnnnnnnnnng time :)

Annoying ads

Axe:
Seems women from all over the world will follow you if you marinate in this perfume. Will Cameron Diaz come/ Will Angelina Jolie come seeking you? Atleast will your own lover come? Hmmm, hope we could have gifted one 2 Devdas so that Paro and he would have stayed happily ever after.
Lux: Seems you don't need any lights if you bathe in dis soap; provides your skin dat much glow. All Tamil Nadu households and industries too MUST use Lux and stop cursing Amma for unscheduled power cuts

Colgate: Does your toothpaste have salt content in it? So that we can abolish the phrase 'swwet-toothed' and coin a new phrase 'salt-toothed'!

Pommys Nighties: Dharidram pidicha vilambaram. Seems people will stop fighting if they see a lady clad in this brand of nighty. As if it was woven listening to Bahudaari raga that evokes calmness! Please send a pack of this stupid nighties to Iraq, Afghan, Indo-Pak border, etc...

All the sanitary napkins' ads: These will boost your confidence and let your dream take wings - like you can jump a fence for cricket match, you can win dancing competition, you can swim/ride a bike, you can sleep in whatever position you want... Oh plsssss - sanitary pads were not even heard of in the days of Capt Lakshmi Sahagal/Amelia Earhart/Rukmini Devi Arundale.

But, a few likes also: the UNICEF sponsored ad on anemia awareness among menstruating women. Applause for the ad coz most of those women get just plain rice wid a 'summar' curry and are treated like untouchables being given a separate plate/tumbler and no pillow, bla bla... Yes we need a good food & good sleep to enjoy the monthly boon bestowed to us women :)

Women women women....

Women women women....
In our pre-teens we have buds blossoming in blouses which when comes into contact with anything hurts really; in our teens we have a monthly visitor to welcome whom we stuff a mini mattress and suffer cramps; in our 20s we get married and a red-headed rod pokes us in places that we never knew we had; in our 30s we raise children (the constant pooping machines), juggle between office & work, try satiating the insatiables at both the places; in our 40s have a hell of time with our now-at-teens children; in our 50s suffer menopause and yell at everyone; in our 60s strive to get a good name as m-i-l!!
Wonder, even the AHIMSA MOORTHY Gandhiji will turn spiteful if he was a woman

ஆண்களும் அழகு தான்

நீண்ட நாட்களாக எழுத  நினைத்த ஒரு விஷயம். ஏனோ இன்று தான் என் சிந்தனைக்கு, இல்லை இல்லை, ஆற்றாமைக்கு எழுத்துருவம் தர முடிந்தது. சினிமா பாடல்களில் ஆகட்டும் கவிதைகளில் ஆகட்டும்  பெண்களையும் பெண்களின் இடை, மார்பு, புட்டம் பற்றியே ஸ்லாகித்து எழுதுகிறார்கள். உலக மலர்கள் பறித்து இரண்டு பந்துகள் அமைத்து பெண்ணை சமைத்து விட்டான், ஒரு கோடி பூக்கள் கொண்டு ஜோடி பூக்கள் செய்தானோ, வட்டம் பற்றி படித்தேன் உன் நெஞ்சின் மேலே என அடுக்கி கொண்டே செல்லலாம்... (நாமும் கூட உருளை பற்றி ஆணுறுப்பில் படிக்கலாமே!) ஏன் ஆண்களில் அழகானவர்களே இல்லையா அல்லது இந்த வர்ணனை எழுதும் ஆண்களுக்கு தங்கள் இனத்தை பற்றி  தாழ்வு மனப்பான்மையா? அல்லது கவிதை எழுதுகிறேன் பேர்வழி என்று தங்கள் வக்கிர ஆசைகளை வார்த்தைகளில் தீர்த்து கொள்கிறார்களா? புரியவில்லை.... ஒருவரும் ஆண்களின் மீசை, கிருதா, ஆண்குறி பற்றியெல்லாம் எழுதுவதே இல்லையே?  ஏன், இந்திய நாரிமணிகள் அதையெல்லாம் ரசிக்க மாட்டார்கள் என்ற குருட்டு நம்பிக்கையா? அப்பாஸ் ஐயும் அஜித் ஐயும் பார்க்க இன்னும் வீட்டுக்கு தெரியாமல் கிராமத்தில் இருந்து வரும் சிறுமிகள் ஏராளம்... எத்தனையோ urban பெண்மணிகள் ஹ்ரிதிக் ரோஷன், டிராவிட், ஜோஹ்ன்னி தேப்ப், டி காப்ரியோ போன்றவர்களின் படங்களை Oh my Adonis என ரசித்து கொண்டு screensaver ஆக வைக்கிறார்களே... அதென்னவோ அத்தனை ஓரவஞ்சனை இந்த "கவிஞர்களுக்கு" ......

Rajinikant & Didi: Clash of the Titans

Dealing with Didi

It’s a sunny morning in Chennai and the telephone at 18,

Raghava Veera Avenue

, Poes Garden, rings. Its ‘Mannu’mohan on the line and pleads with Rajini to take care of Mamata Didi and hungs the phone with a ‘Vive la Sonia ji!’

SS (super star): Aah… jujubi matter ma. Kadavule, Didi ya kaapathu pa.

A cup of kaapi from Jillu (Latha maami) and Thalaivar starts scheming; flash; sends an army of Robots to Bengal. The march of robots sends the City of Joy in a tizzy and didi baffled by this Paribartan immediately sets out to namma Chennai….

SS in white churidar kurta with his bald pate shining strides over to greet didi.

SS: Vanakkam didi. Aaaahh Shagotom. Kemon achchen?

Didi: bhalo achchi… apni bangla bolte paren.

SS: Ha ha ha (his TM laugh). matro ekṭi bhasha jotheshṭo noe. Please sit, Jillu Get a cup of chai for Didi. Aahn, in a kullar. Idhu eppadi irukku – ha ha ha

Didi: I’m not here to see your gimmicks. Just now, I put an end to the Red revolution in Bengal and now there is a robot revolution happening. I want to know the reason behind this Paribartan, Rajini ji

SS: didi, adhigama aasaipadra pombalaiyum, adha vida adhigama condition podra koottani thalaivarum nalla vaazhndada saritharam illa. Coming to the point, Mannu called me up to tackle your political gimmicks. I was also okay with it; yaen na aandavan solraan arunachalam mudikkaran… let me tell you something didi – aandavan kettavangalukku neraya kuduppan aana kai vitruvaan. Today maybe Mannu listens to you and the whole UPA dances to your tunes but do you think it will be like dis forever?

Didi: Now, who is Arunachalam? This man is even more baffling.

SS: cool, didi, cool…. I’ll sing a song. Hit song. Why this kolaveri kolaveri kolaveri didi?

Didi: Its Kolaberi.

SS: aaah enaku veri varudhu. Didi, you remind me of Padayappa Neelambari. Marupadiyum solren - adhigama aasaipadra pombalaiyum, adha vida adhigama condition podra koottani thalaivarum nalla vaazhndada saritharam illa. (Throws a walkie-talkie kinda thing on the table) This is to call back the robots army from Bengal. Fone a neenga edutha samaadhanam, naan edutha sandai. Theriyum ila, naan oru thadavai sonna nooru thadavai sonna madhiri.

(in a highly infuriated tone) R’ber Baasha bhai? R’ber the Endhiran climax? If you refuse, the robots will multiply themselves in a pattern and completely take over your City of Joy…. Idhu varaikum Bhayanakam a irunda neenga ini saadhvigama santhama maaranum. Else there will be a sequel to Sivaji: the Boss and you will meet the fate of Suman and that, my didi, will be the climax of your rule.

Didi (Panicked): Thamun! (And agrees to mellow down and mind her work without exerting pressure on anyone incl. Mannu and leaves without even having her dupurer khaabaar)

SS: ha, semma matter ma, inda madhiri yezhu naal seiyyanum!

Sachin 'TON'dulkar

Interesting comments by various personalities on Sachin’s century:( as usual, imagination only)

1. Digvijay Singh – Sachin is an RSS agent. All these days he was waiting to score his century against a Muslim country.

2. Manmohan Singh – I congratulate Sachin and also appreciate leadership of Shrimati Sonia Gandhi.
...
3. Rahul Gandhi – My grandmother created Bangladesh. She deserves the credit for this century.
... 4. Raj Thackeray – Sachin has proved himself to be a true Marathi Manus after scoring this century. So what if India has lost, Maharashtrians can not take the responsibility of the whole nation.
5. Mulayam Singh Yadav – If Sachin was from UP, I would have made tickets of all Cricket matches ‘Tax free’.

6. Anna Hazare – Sachin deserves to be the next lokpal of the country.

7. Baba Ramdev – If you multiply all the runs Sachin has made by a billion is what is the total black money in foreign country.
8. Kapil Sibbal – Social media need to control comments on Sachin’s century. It will harm the fabric of secularism in India.
9. Swami Agnivesh – Now that Bangladesh has helped Sachin score his 100th century, they have proved to be a true friend of India. Lets welcome their citizen in India and let them live wherever they can. Lets issue them voter’s ID card.

10. Kris Shrikant – We selectors hope that by 2050, Sachin will also score his 150th century.
11. Arjun Tendulkar – I want to play with my father in 2020 world cup.

12. Sachin Tendulkar himself – Aaeellaaaa…. Now what excuse I will make to not retire.
13. Sonia Gandhi – Er….. She did not respond since she is suffering from an undisclosed disease.

Bus Journey

Caution: This is not a travelogue and pls dont leave the page disapoointing.
What comes to your mind when you think of a bus journey? No, not the ones where long roads (with their hair-pin bends and curves ahead placards) unravel a scenic, misty view of hill station. I'm talking about our daily mode of commute - local city buses. Besides the crowd, nauseating odours arising from your co-passengers to damage your olfactory nerves and some unruly conductors, bus journey is quite fun.
Many funny banterings happen around... and from one of those banters only, I learnt that our Pernthalaivar Kamarajar (our most humble ex-CM and the Kingmaker who introduced midday meal scheme to lure rural children to school - it's not the Dravidian parties' scheme) had a Kethu dosham and that's why he was a celibate!! Two men were talking in the opposite row of seat and I couldn't control my grin.
Another day, a good-looking gal was shouting at her BF over mobile thus: "Unna love pannadhuku Airtel la evanayavdhu love pannirukalam; daily ethanai message, calls varudhu ange irundhu"! (I shuda loved some guy from Airtel as I get most of the smss & calls from them only). I'm sure the BF must have immediately laughed & made amends :).
And the usual cinema kisu kisu (gossips), m-i-ls compaining about their d-i-l's thalayanai manthiram & the changed behavior of their beloved sons in women's row; new models of mobile phones, udhavakkarai sons (i've noticed most of the dads are not at all proud of their sons), new film/audio releases, friends getting mokkais from their respective figures..... in men's row of seats. And both genders unanimously pull down conductor's leg sometimes :)
PS: And, in a bus ourney you can be sympathetic to pregnant ladies or to those shouldering toddlers and lose your smartphones/wallets, etc - ust like me & some of my friends did :-(

Whither Indian erotica?

Coming from the land of Kamasutra, it is but natural for me to think and wail about the present state of erotic literature. You may look at askance as u read but no one can help it and biological urges cannot be suppressed for a long time though many people in this complacent society act as Puritans and secretly enjoy titillating songs/photos/Websites.

History, esply Indian history, is replete with evidence of erotica in temple architecture or literature as in Khajuraho sculptures, Kamasutra, narrative Jain literature in Prakriti language full of eroticism, Sangam Tamil poetry, Rasakreeda (erotic foreplays between Krishna and Gopikas) and even Soundarya Lahiri composed by the great saint Adi Sankara where he describes and praises the fullness of Devi’s breasts. But all these sensual contents are in the past, what about now?

When it comes to painting the canvas with erotica, late MF Hussain, Jogen Choudhary and more recently Open Magazine’s Mihir Shrivastava (who uses nude models in his works) come into the picture. But what about those who do not know to appreciate this genre and view it only as naked paintings (not knowing the difference between nude and naked)? You say, books & cinema? Ugh, erotic literature is yet to come of age here. In books/novels, especially in Tamil, I can hardly find any. Though the mavericks of Tami fiction, Thi. Janakiraman and Ku. Pa. Rajagopalan, had in their works extra-marital affairs in the under current they never crossed their limit and described in detail. Even in his master-piece ‘Amma Vandhaal’ Thi Ja, although speaks of the mother’s affair with husband’s friend, does not delves deeper into (no pun intended) the description of the act as such! Sujatha, although he is known for his sci-fi novellas and his simple in style modern day prose, had a breast- fetish (like our director Gautham Menon’s foot-fetish. Kindly observe Ivan Yaaro, Vaseegara songs from Minnale, Omana Penne in VTV and the posters of Ek Deewana Thaa, then you’ll know wat I mean!). Sujatha’s penchant for his leading ladies’ globes can be found from the following passages : Priya (aval parandha maarbin mel irandu per sadhurangame vilayadalam pol irundadhu), Meghangalai thurathinavan (rathnavin meth endra andha edathil mugam pudhaikka vendum endrirundhadhu), En iniya endhira (pointing out at bra - enaku indha ullani elaam anindhu pazhakam illai. Mano- naan eppedho adhai parthu vittaen), Meendum Jeeno (kuzhandai pirandhal lactation ku payanpadum idhanaal veru evvalavu payangal irukkiradhu - the dog wondering so), etc.

I’m not talking about the Kamasutra types either, I know if anyone dares try the postures, chances are there the very next day he/she might be rushed to an Ortho. Only a gymnast can try those postures, it seems to me. And  I’m not talking about the Kumudam sketches either where heavy dosages of cleavage & hips are prescribed. You say our national  tabloid – the Slimes of India, huh? I don’t think any sexually-active man will ever look at those bottoms and breasts and the gossips on a daily basis. Maybe, erectile dysfunction cases can look thru the tabloid at those plastic jobs and artificial melons and salivate while marvelling at the handiwork of plastic surgeons. Come on, even Rasputin’s 13-inch long instrument needed some rest, I ‘ve read. (Yes, tks to Appa’s leniency and freedom given to me). Again I’m talking about sensualism and not porn-selling.

And in cinema, Bollywood/Kollywood or any other wood displays everything threadbare instead of partially-hiding, adding some sensualism and celebrating the peaks and curves. All those white saris drenched in rain, navel displays, the great fall of pallu with a tight blouse showing the padded up teapot lids and wonderful cinematography&editing zooming in and out continually at women’s breasts/hips causing irritation to your eyes…… Its disgusting! Its disgusting to watch so many botoxed beauties with a ‘velakennai kudicha’ look failing to glorify their mysterious curvaceous bodies thus killing the eroticism on silver screen. It just celebrates rape and vulgarity.

Why cant the ‘kalai thaagam pidichcha’ Indian artists, taking a cue from their Japanese counterparts, do something like Furry Dojinshi or animated Manga movies/comics? It’s time to rekindle and wake up the almost-dead senses!!

Cine ramblings

First things first - Apologies for being spaced out for such a lonnnnnnng time w/o posting anything. I'm not a filmy person (like my Director-aspirant hubby); I'm more into music (esply Carnatic, Hindustani and Raja sir, of course :) ). Earlier, I used to watch classical, offbeat movies but ot so often, but after marraige I've somehow taken an interest to movies, gossips, Pg 3 kinda things and all that (Talk about sagavaasa dosham, hmmm). One of my colleagues jokingly asked me thus - 'So if S saar makes a movie u can be in charge of the Music dept and we can see ur name in the screen!' Though i seriously doubt if 'S saar' would entrust me wid dat job. Well, a keen observer of people & things around (It pays to be a caricaturist, man) I have observed some things (some stupid also) in films which I'd lilke to pour down....
Yaen, yaen, yaen:
1. Despite giving their best efforts (that too sans pancakes mostly), Director Bala's heroines will only ee ottufy after the movie? Eg: Sangeetha, Laila in Pithamagan; wonderful Pooja in Naan Kadavul. Where are the gals now? Same goes wid Kamal Saar's (my friend AL, I affixed saar to ur hero :) ) heroines also - Abirami in Virumaandi; Kasturi, suganya in Indian, kiran in Anbe Sivam (avanga nadicha padam adhu onnu thaan, mathadhu ellam kaatina padam!)
2. People who applied loads of powder and make-up on Amala Paul's face in MUK completely forgot about her knees? Look at the poster and you will see her in a denim shorts walking wid black knees and elsewhere its all white!! (when I pointed out this, friends said I've a twisted mind, ugh!)
3. Why is it for a K-town hero all the blue skies, white moon and innumerable stars and other mundane things become sooooooooo new only after falling in Lavvv? (hello, unga amma nilava kaati soru ootnadhu ilaya pa?). I called my husband to watch the full moon and i got a sound snore as reply. (Yes, i hear some of u say Befitting. I can read minds, u rascala!)
4. Y is it Suhasini still thinks her husband is the best dir despite churning out a string of flops? for eg, while reacting to some glitches in the rec ently-organised Chennai Film Festival, she stressed dis and said: Adhu maniratnam aagave irundaalum kooda.... (Over confidence, odambukku aagadhu madam)
5. Y no one wants to experiment a film with Simbu as the hero deprived of his speech faculty? (Pls some rest for our ears)
6. Y is it people think one has to torture his/her own self (like tonsuring, 6,8 packs, sipping meals, sudden weight gain, bla bla) to achieve acting? I dont think Sivaji did any of these things but still acknowledged as the best actor globally (Vikram pls note this).
7. Y in the name of taking realism cinema and bringing new heroes, every director shatters our dreams? All parattai thalais, dhaadis, beedis, Yikes! (Enga kanavula nalla azhagana heroes vandhu rommmmmba naal aachu :'( )
PS: Yesterday I watched 'The Artist' movie. Marvellous screenplay and acting. And the actress reminded me of Suhasini (with her oval face, irukka-illaiya cheeks and her smile) and when i told dis to my hubby seated next to me, he was ROTFL. Unakku eppadi ipdi thonudhu?! If u watch the movie and heroine, in particular, pls post a comment here....