New Year Gifts

As we enter a new year filled with optimistic hopes and ambitions and all those never-to-be-implemented resolutions, thought I should gift people who made 2010 unforgettable. So here goes a list of personalities and the gifts dat I wish 2 give 'em. And the topper is, who else than our own Dravida Sudar, A Raja..

A Raja - Hi-funda 3g-enabled mobile phone

Niira Radia - again a mobile phone with anti-tapping software

Dr Manmohan Singh - Innocenti Ignoranti mask

Karunanidhi - zandu balm thalai vali neekum balm (poor old man, entangled between all his sons and daughter and grand nephews)

Ratan Tata - a black suit! (u know wat i mean if u hav listened to the Radiagate conversation)

Barack Obama - a mouthguard (the O man hurt his mouth in a basket ball match and wasn't even able to pronounce 'superfluous'. With this mouthguard, 'YES, YOU CAN')

Jairam Ramesh - DVDs of comedian Vadivelu (to come out with new statements to tickle the funny bone of citizens)

Rahul Gandhi - a 'dabba' of saffron (bhai saab, saffron is not dat dangerous)

Director Shankar - kayakalpam (in his tireless effort to show a 60-plus man young on screen, poor guy, he seems very aged)

Mani Ratnam - books on 108 Upanishads (u can make a film based on these also) plus a bonus - photo profile of leading actressess in Bollywood, Kollywood, tollywood, firewood, etc (U seem to know only the Ice Queen, but please saab mudke toh zara dekho naa kitni actressess hain jo 'acting' jaante hain!!)

Shishir Kunder (Farah khan's hubby) - a month-long vacation with Baadshah SRK (to make him realise "u can't try a satire on a man whom u have never met!")

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To my own self - a box of cottonwool (to avoid all the muft gyaan & gibberish talk u-know-who- give me)

to my wonderful husband - a hi-power hearing enhancer